j-b asked:
i have a prob,last 1day ive got a dispute with my husband,as he wanted to have *** and i didnt want to,so he insulted me telling me that i was an horrible person.so i didnt talk to him,when he came back ystdy he didnt talk either.even 2day hes off,he went to gym.what should i do?am waiting 4him to xcuz himself bcoz hes all at fault.but he seems to be the one who was insulted.hlp pls coz weve never had dispute like this before.
the kind of insult is u nforgiveable.if i could tell u this insult u will be shocked.am really hurt,i know he wont ever ask 4 forgiveness,am i that childish.
Viola
i have a prob,last 1day ive got a dispute with my husband,as he wanted to have *** and i didnt want to,so he insulted me telling me that i was an horrible person.so i didnt talk to him,when he came back ystdy he didnt talk either.even 2day hes off,he went to gym.what should i do?am waiting 4him to xcuz himself bcoz hes all at fault.but he seems to be the one who was insulted.hlp pls coz weve never had dispute like this before.
the kind of insult is u nforgiveable.if i could tell u this insult u will be shocked.am really hurt,i know he wont ever ask 4 forgiveness,am i that childish.
Viola
Tags: Hes, Horrible Person, Insult
Denise
tell him u were tired etc
Ella
possibly some mutual maturity and owning your own behavior is in order here. Just a suggestion
Jose
let him know that you love him and that you were sorry you turned him down but that you really wasnt in the mood at that time and can you make it up to him later tonight
oh, and ask him if next time he would just let you know that his feeling were hurt and to cut out the childish silent treatment
Adrian
One of you has to be the mature person here and mend this rift. It appears he will not be that person because he’s acting like a little boy.
You need to sit down with him and talk this out. Has this been an ongoing thing or just the first time? You do not have to have *** with someone, even your husband, if you do not want to.
Willie
I am sorry…but this is so juvenile…..you both were at fault…now you both need to apologize to each other. Do you want to be right? or do you want to be happy?
Allan
Communicate - you have the right to say no - stop finding fault, find a solution. Tell him why you said no and work on fixing it.
Francis
Spoiled brat……let him pout.
Obviously he hasn’t learned sugar will get him farther for what he wants than vinegar.
Darlene
No marital problem is 100%. You each share some of the responsiabilty of the dispute. If I were you when he gets home don’t use words to communicate. Show him how you feel about him and the dispute will be over.
Monica
go see him at the gym and ask if you can join him. he’ll be well made up!
Ray
You prepare a nice dinner and talk to him and explain the reasosn why you did not want to have ***…tell him everything you feel be open and honest and make him see as well that when you are not in the mood for *** there are other nice things that you can do together… and kindly ask him to explains how he feels and make him know that he is still desirable too…
Kim
You certainly had reasons to refuse, but he was hurt cz of your refusal. Tell him that you are equally hurt by his behaviour so the account is square and both may start afresh now!
Things like that are not to be taken seriously. Even if you ask to be excused, it will be OK. You both love eachother and that is important.
Good luck!
Antonio
What an idiot.
You weren’t in the mood for sex, so he thinks insulting you is going to put you in the mood?
Harvey
Why are you waiting for him? He wanted sex, you didn’t give it to him, he insulted you, you guys are not talking to each other, all is left is for one of you to cheat with someone else. Those are the perfect ingredients for a disaster. You have to talk to him and tell him that you are sorry for not wanting *** at the time, but that he also hurt you with what he said. COMMUNICATION is the best solution for most problems in this world, yet we keep on ignoring it. Remember that communication is not yelling or cursing.
Dawn
Tell him to grow up. Its amazing how men can turn it on in an instant and expect us to jump right on board. tell him it wasn’t anything personal but you need more persuasion than just wham bam thank you ma’am. Let him get over it and when his pride isn’t wounded tell him that sometimes you just aren’t ready to accommodate him…. Sorry…….. I am being cryptic because of the kids on here. Email me if you want a clearer explanation.
Erin
This happens between most couples. Maybe you should take the 1st step and say I’m sorry. Is it more important that he be the one to apologize or that you two make up and move on. Also, you have to realize that a relationship is about compromise. You two aren’t always going to want to have *** at the exact same time. So, even when you don’t want it, you may want to at least consider giving in and meeting him in the middle. Just like, *** or no, I’m sure that you want to do things sometimes and he gives in even if he really doesn’t want to.
It wasn’t ok for him to insult you, though. I would expect an apology for that. But, remember marriage is a compromise and is all about doing your best to keep the other happy.
Unfortunately, some of us girls get it into our heads that a guy should meet us in the middle on everything, be sweet and considerate and blah, blah, blah but that we shouldn’t have to keep him pleased, especially in bed, unless we want to. That’s wrong ladies. I don’t know if this applies to you, it may not. But, everyone should remember that *** is as important as anything else in a marriage.
Joshua
he needs to grow UP….
just because we are married, doesn’t mean we feel like having *** at the same time, all of the time.
maybe you could let him know you two need to talk… let him know you feel insulted and put down…
he’s selfish.
Carolyn
It sounds like you are both acting like children.
Frank
i guess having control of the *** in the relationship is that important to you..it seems like maybe it might have been easier to just give it up…a lot of women dont seem to understand this.
Benjamin
You shouldn’t be the one saying sorry.He should be sorry. He shouldn’t have insulted you for not wanting ***. If I were you I wouldn’t give him any tonight either.
Phyllis
First, good for you in telling him no. it seems that long term relationships, people forget how to make love rather than have *** sometimes.
Secondly, as in any relationship honesty is the best policy. so take the first step and approach him and tell him how he made you feel. you will never get anywhere by just “letting it blow over”.
Sally
I’m sure you had perfectly good reasons for not wanting ***.
And he will turn this into a perfectly good reason to cheat on you.
By your controlling and emasculating behavior, you have undermined his ego and self-esteem. I’m sure you feel very good about yourself for denying him. I’m sure that your next husband will be more pliable.